I want to affirm what being alive is. Most of us, me included die too much. How little we live.
Alive is choice. You choose so much. How much of what to eat. When to do anything. What route, scenic, or fast, to take. It is not true that you choose how you feel. Not at first. You can change how you deal with feelings for the long term but I think it best to let the big ones fly, and dilute, provided you don't scare the kids or dog. Examine how you got their later. I wonder how many killings could be prevented by people if they would just give themselves a break from their own standards.
Dying starts with regression. You can have a great job like, Crime Scene Photographer. This career could wear you down like any other if you let it. Trust me, a lot of crime scenes look alike and are hard to remember. I'm glad a person, special to me, encouraged my writing and specifically this blogging. It makes me feel like I have 'something else' going on. Regression starts with stagnation, I kill stagnation knowing that I can use what I go through to help others. A purpose, a higher calling breathes new life into a stagnant circumstance. Purpose kills the lingering death that is beset upon us to such a degree that many are dying on our feet.
I don't like picking weeds or overgrown grass. I have discovered that my chickens love the stuff. Where I had an acre of weeds and grass before I now see a food source for my birds who make the best eggs ever. Just the thought bouyes me in the effort to pick and clean up. I am running low on weeds now, the grass is getting farther away from the coop. Those silly birds have added purpose and motivation to my maintenance.
Instead of dying on your feet, give stagnation a kick in the ass, when it runs off you will see a clear path ahead.